How Embracing One
CHANGE YOUR LIFE
Has a recent breakup left you feeling like you are spinning out of control?
No matter what the loss or how it happened we all have to go through the 5 stages of grief. Searching for and viewing this page shows you are in or close to the last stage known as acceptance. Acceptance of our loss doesn’t mean we are happy about or OK with it. Acceptance simply means we’ve come to realize there is no going back and the only way forward is through. By reaching the acceptance stage you are now free to focus on what is most important which is getting your life back and feeling good about who and where you are now.
We’ve all been there.
Meet Amber. When we met she was experiencing the worst pain she could imagine. After spending many years being part of a couple, a team, a partnership she suddenly found herself alone and without an explanation she could make sense of. Seemingly without warning her world was turned upside down and everything she counted on and found familiar in her personal life was no longer there.
Perhaps you can relate.
Amber had a job she loved and was good at, but with all the emotions, thoughts and questions running through her head she was finding it really difficult to concentrate. All the well meaning encouragement and platitudes from friends just seemed to make things worse. Like many of us Amber had given over so much of herself to her relationship identity that she’d forgotten how to focus on what had made her strong and attractive in the first place. She was seeing herself through what she perceived as the opinion of her estranged partner and didn’t like the view. It was taking a toll on her self-esteem and she was wondering if she’d ever feel normal again.
Somewhere deep inside she knew it was his loss, but over the course of her relationship she’d quit giving herself the daily affirmations she needed to keep that value in the front of her mind. As we worked together, she began understanding the changes she needed to implement in order to reclaim her confidence and take back control of her life. She began to adjust her focus and enhance her innate strengths to get her feet back on solid ground.
You can get there too.
Amber is still at it. We still meet to discuss her progress and challenges. But now instead of rehashing and reliving the past she now focuses on her new improved reality. The struggles of life don’t go away, but you can face them head-on and succeed!
It’s time you got your life back. Let’s talk.
A LITTLE BIT ABOUT ME– AND HOW I CAN HELP
Amber is an actual client of mine, although I’ve changed some details to protect her privacy. But what about me?
Maybe it will help you to know that I’m human, too. I’ve been through difficult circumstances and emerged victorious. But I still struggle with daily issues. The difference now is that I know how to recognize destructive patterns of thinking and stop them dead in their tracks.
We can’t always change our circumstances, but we can overcome them. Using this amazing gift we have called “the mind,” you can change your life. I’m living proof.
TELL ME IF THIS SOUNDS FAMILIAR…
Meet Julie. As the beautiful, intelligent and talented daughter of a successful and respected small town surgeon it seemed a perfect match when my mother married the handsome college jock. As expected, they had the fairy tale wedding followed by two healthy children and an immaculate home.
For years, all outward appearances were that of the perfect family. But behind closed doors was another story entirely.
Rife with insecurities and bitterness stemming from childhood injustices, both real and imagined, she directed her anger and pain outward rather than looking at its origins and fixing it where it started.
As is common, these pains and insecurities travel from one generation to another and I became poisoned with many of the same difficulties, insecurities and struggles passed from my grandmother to my mother to me.
Is your story like this?
When we are young with developing minds, few of us have the confidence to think independently enough to allow us to shut down those critics, especially when they are our parents who most of society is telling us we must respect and listen to.
So my young, impressionable mind took her words as evidence of my inadequacies. Therefore, I came to believe if I succeeded, I’d fulfill her predictions. My naturally driven and perfectionist nature was continually at odds with the erroneously instilled belief that striving to be better, desiring to win, being first or in any way recognized for my natural talents, gifts and achievements were indeed proof of the worst kind of failing.
It didn’t stop me from continually attempting new things and challenging myself, but instead, I began to see failure as acceptable, and while being second place always hurt my heart, intellectually I justified it as the proper place for me.
Does failure seem to define you?
The difficulty increases when we begin seeing each of our failures as who we are and allowing it define our character. One by one we begin accepting our failures as not only expected but right. With every new one we accept we make successive failure easier to handle. Failure, not success becomes the norm and while we unconsciously being structuring our lives for this pattern our self-esteem also plummets.
Do you have low self-esteem?
It would take two more decades, allowing myself to reach rock bottom physically by tipping the scales at nearly 300 pounds and on more than one occasion reaching the emotional certainty that I had nothing to offer the world and my life was not worth living. However, eventually, I had to realize that I had both a right and an obligation to meet my potential and succeed in what I was best at.
That’s where it started for me. Now I’m here to help YOU get that start!
About me, Dawn Keegan
Owner of Mind and Body Coaching, I’m a certified life coach, United States Marine, former fat person and author of the soon to be released book Honestly Speaking. I am incredibly passionate about helping women find their voice and develop the confidence that lets them lead the life they’ve always imagined.